It's been a baaad week. I didn't stay on plan for long. First, it was Admin Professionals Day on Wednesday, and although my co-workers dropped the pretense that it would be a surprise (hello, it's right there on the calendar!) and just straight out asked me what kind of cake I wanted, they did not honor my request for a fruit plate instead. Although I did good on Wednesday, my willpower collapsed on Thursday and it's been downhill from there. I guess that's what I get from starting a life-style change on a whim. I'm going to stick to it though, and plan better for next week. Having healthy food on hand makes all the difference.

I broke one of my cardinal rules of weight-loss today, and bought clothes one size smaller than what I currently fit into. It's such a waste of money--buying something with the intention of using it later, which turns into never. But. I need new clothes badly. Work clothes, casual clothes, you name it, I ain't got it. I've been on a tight budget for the last few years, and buying more fat clothes hasn't been a priority. And I can't stomach buying more size 24s. In the fall, my 24s were so loose they were nearly falling off, and although I've put some of that weight back on and they fit again, I know that if I stick to WW this time around, I'll be into 22s in no time. No time at all. And now I have another goal/deadline of sorts. These pants have a 90 day expiration date, so if I can't wear them by the middle of July, back they go.

Damn, that means my birthday is only about 90 days away. I can't believe I'm almost 26. That's fucking depressing.

I hated asking for the fruit instead of cake at work this week, because I had to tell everyone why I was abstaining and it's just not a conversation that I want to have ongoing. It is a form of accountability, I guess, so if I don't lose I'll be recognized as a loser, but also, I'm not comfortable with my weight as a topic of conversation. It's great to get complements, but I don't want to feel like people are focused on that.